Tom Erickson, C.E.O of Acquia, an open-source softwear company, addresses the value of accepting failure on an emotional level in this Corner Office interview. He states, “I’m looking for people who are going to jump in and own their own work, who are going to risk something and risk failing.”
I just read a rather large article on the cover the Sunday New York Times Review section about pornography and adolescents that basically summarized multiple studies as inconclusive at best. I have a first hand perspective having seen the effects of premature exposure to porn first hand in clinical practice with sex addiction. Pornography is addictive and harmful, especially to adolescents and young adults. I say this because I have listened to countless stories of desensitization and trouble with intimacy. Desensitization basically means that normal, healthy sex is boring and sometimes nearly impossible for people whose neurology has changed as a result of overexposure to porn. Watching more and more porn leads some people to view harder, stranger, and rougher material as their dopamine system seeks greater stimulation.
Don Knauss, the C.E.O. Of the Clorox Company is a former Marine and athlete who makes tons of sense. He believes in motivating others by creating trust through exercising power cautiously and caring about his people to such an extent that they are primary – what he refers to as the heart piece. Like myself, he agrees that intelligence is important too but without heart over time it’s hard to retain great people. He too looks for passion over pedigree and believes in the necessity of becoming an excellent communicator. I really enjoyed his perspective because it reminded me of so much that I offer and teach others; especially the importance of hammering away at the fundamentals: my core teaching is to avoid nothing, be as present as possible, have bang-up integrity, honor yourself, and learn to develop and trust your intuition!
I am a huge Gabriel Cousens fan. An M.D (psychiatrist), accomplished author, homeopath, and deeply spiritual being (enlightened), he exemplifies creativity, knowledge, grace, and contribution. His Tree of Life Foundation in Arizona offers all kinds of experiences and knowledge on nutrition, meditation, spirituality as well as a host of other important perspectives on living a healthy, successful life! His books science, spirit, and nutrition are profound. When I read his book Spiritual Nutrition several years ago after going through a devastating health crisis that cost me my health, my business, my self-esteem, my relationship and much more, I finally realized what had happened to me. Dr. Cousens is a true genius! In his words,”I am at peace in my body, mind, family, community, ecology, and with God.” Thank you Dr. Cousens!
Adam Bryant interviews Jeff Lawson, the C.E.O of Twilio, a cloud communications company based in San Francisco in this week’s Corner Office section of the Sunday New York Times business section. An entrepreneur since age 12 when he started a video production business, Mr. Lawson discusses the value of communication and resolving conflict something his crew rarely did in his next enterprise, a dot.com company.
The cover article for the Sports Sunday section of this weekend’s New York Times features excerpts from ‘Cycle of Lies’ Juliet Macur’s new book on Lance Armstrong. Reading this story reminds me of several conversations I had with a professional riding coach when I lived in New Mexico in 1997. It was obvious then that the culture of professional cycling was so corrupt that Lance had to be cheating. I used to share that belief with others well before it became obvious to the world. The challenge for all of us who try to live with high integrity is what to do when everyone around you is cheating? For a competitive cyclist to succeed then you simply had to cheat. If you didn’t, someone else would and that would put you at a significant disadvantage not just in terms of winning but around fame, fortune, and your ability to make a living at the sport you loved.
The story of Silk Road Founder Ross Ulbricht in the Sunday Business section of the New York Times is an interesting sketch on a complex personality. On the one hand, he seems to be kind, compassionate, and deeply philosophical young adult who graduated from several top schools, was well regarded by his peers and parents and found a way to create an interesting living confidentially matching buyers and sellers on the web using Bitcoin, a computer generated currency that is currently unregulated. On the other hand, Silk Road seems to have been set up primarily to provide buyers and sellers of illicit drugs and other illegal activities with a means of connecting anonymously through advanced encryption technology called Tor. Mr. Ulbricht believed strongly in economic freedom and extremely limited government. The FBI recently arrested him and charged him with a series of crimes that make him out to be a sociopath.
The New York Times Sunday Review section has a cover article on toxic wealth or addiction to money as the author, Sam Polk, a former Wall Street Trader puts it. For years, he felt lousy about seven figure bonuses because colleagues made even more. The money, though outrageous by Main Street standards, was never enough. I have lived and worked in Fairfield County, Connecticut on and off for decades. I have seen this phenomenon many times firsthand as a psychologist and business coach – not having enough. A women I saw recently was bitter at her husband because they went thru several million dollars of her savings, which she got in a divorce to a Wall Street guy, over the course of a ten year marriage and she only had ten million left and it wasn’t nearly enough because even her “poor friends” had more. This not enough mentality is pervasive in our culture, Hollywood and Wall Street being extreme examples. What we don’t have enough of is kindness, creativity, and compassion from my perspective. As Mr. Polk points out, “only a wealth addict would feel justified in receiving $14 million in compensation – as the C.E.O of McDonalds did in 2012 while his company then published a brochure for its work force on how to survive on their low wages.” This is not an easy issue to address in a culture that idolizes the super-rich. It’s a good article to raise awareness, the first step to change!
Jane Isay writes eloquently about her marriage to a gay Psychiatrist in her book and cover story in Psychology Today magazine. She lived a lie for over a decade of marriage before her husband told her the truth. As she acknowledged, Ms. Isay preferred to live a fantasy of the perfect marriage than face the truth of a marriage devoid of sexual intimacy. Once his secret was out, they continued to live a lie with their friends, family, and professional community for years until it became nearly impossible to continue.
I find international politics and business fascinating. Each week, I read about Vladimir Putin somewhere. His grip on power in Russia is extraordinary and his strategic moves are equally fascinating! For instance, he gave Edward Snowden, the former U.S. government contractor, asylum in Russia basically giving President Obama and The United States the middle finger. In his latest move, he pardoned Mikhail Khodorkovsky, the billionaire tycoon imprisoned ten years ago on dubious charges of tax evasion. He seems like the ultimate power broker often out-maneuvering his western counterparts. On the one hand, he seems clever and bold. On the other hand, he seems downright diabolical. As a nation, Russia seems to repeat the same patterns (early childhood dynamics) over and over like most people do. With a long history of dictatorial and authoritarian rule, not all that much has changed. Changing old patterns, whether it is for an individual or a country is never easy. It takes time, patience, commitment, and desire. For now, much of that desire seems to be lacking in Russia or perhaps, it is simply too dangerous. All things change, however!